Good responses from everyone...but your last post said it all. If he's not willing to be with you when you are going thru surgery why continue? He's pulling away for sure. I'm sorry you're going thru this, I can totally relate to what you are going through.
It is time to take a step back for your sake. You can take everything into account in your life & decide what YOU need to do. He's clearly made his decision. I'm sorry, but don't let him manipulate you anymore. He needs time?? Whatever...get up, brush yourself off, and chalk this up to experience.
I hope you do well in your surgery, and again, I'm sorry you're going thru this.
SK